Srinagar, April 1 -- Why is it that when people are alive, we so often fail to tell them what they truly mean to us? Why do our feelings and emotions seem to awaken with their fullest force only after they are gone? Why do we suddenly begin to feel there was so much more we could have done, so much more we could have said, so much more love we could have shown?

Ever since the passing of my cousin-in-law, Shafiq Ahmad Mir, whom we all lovingly called Baya, these thoughts have not left me. It has been four days, and I find myself carrying a strange and painful feeling of inadequacy. Not because my relationship with him lacked affection or closeness, it did not. My bond with him was always warm, affectionate and full of respect. Yet I canno...