India, Sept. 27 -- I called Vivek Singh, my New Delhi-based coach on a day when I was falling apart. He hates being called a life coach. Instead, he is described as a self-mastery coach. It was the kind of day I didn't want to discuss philosophy or go through Socratic questioning. I just wanted someone to tell me what was happening to me and why.

"Cut the questions, Vivek," I said. "I don't have the bandwidth. Just give me an opinion on why am I melting." It didn't take him too long to nail it.

"You're in pain. And you're grieving," he said. Even as that was sinking in, he said there's an upside to it. "How would you even know it was pain if you hadn't known joy? The reason this hurts is because you fear losing joy. That's not weakness....